Tuesday, February 14, 2006

The sound of shattering

I sit at the light at Fulton and Magnolia, watching life unfold in slow-motion. I don't know who is at fault - maybe they're both distracted by something else. An e-mail, or a phone call they never expected to get. Or never wanted to get. Two separate worlds unaware of each, colliding in one horrible moment, inches in front me. I laugh with God, as I thank him for being spared, while musing together about the irony of my own lunchtime trip to the car wash. I'm trying to sort things out. But, all I can do is sit here.. brakes on, blinker on.. thinking. Why am I always the guy before the guy? Is it that I'm not good enough? Or did she realize that I am, and settle for the next one to come along and ask? Why would someone who never settles, start now?

Better question...

Would I be sitting here at the light, blinker flashing, eye welling up, if I had asked her in the first place?

I'm eternally thankful for those that have come back into my life. And those who never left. It's an unexpected hand when you can't seem to find your footing.

Still, it hurts to breathe today.
7:10 PM

...:::about

This is the true story of a radio personality who quit his job, packed up his things, and moved to L.A. to live his dream. Welcome to the official account of life on Earth, as seen through the eyes of Jason Burns... Actor, Writer, and Jackass.

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Los Angeles

101 things in 1001 days

Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.*

I've got to:

    professional

  1. appear in a play/musical
  2. take voice lessons
  3. write 3 screenplays
  4. write an episodic
  5. get a poem published
  6. appear in a film
  7. take an improv class
  8. take a Meisner class
  9. write an e-book
  10. learn Flash or Dreamweaver
  11. design & build my professional web site
  12. get a commercial agent
  13. get a theatrical agent
  14. buy a laptop
  15. learn Final Cut
  16. get new headshots
  17. produce a new v/o demo
  18. make at least 10 new industry contacts
  19. prepare two monologues for audition
  20. watch all five Best Picture nominees prior to the Oscars
  21. collaborate on a musical

    22. cultural

  22. take a refresher course in Spanish
  23. read Shakespeare's complete works
  24. shoot pictures of L.A.
  25. go to a concert
  26. read the Bible
  27. stay at The Standard
  28. go to San Francisco
  29. learn to play guitar
  30. go to the L.A. Zoo
  31. go to Tijuana
    32. COMPLETED 01/22/06
  32. read the DaVinci Code
  33. hit a random bar on Sunset
  34. attend Comic-Con
  35. attend an outdoor music festival
  36. see live jazz/blues
  37. try caviar
  38. go to a beach volleyball tournament
  39. camp on the beach
  40. visit New York at Christmas
  41. attend a black-tie event
  42. explore downtown L.A.
  43. hike somewhere new
  44. visit Scotland
  45. see an old movie in the Broadway Theatre District
  46. attend at least one film festival
  47. visit a museum
  48. attend an art show
  49. read the Constitution

    50. fitness & leisure

  50. switch gyms
  51. cut BMI by at least 5
  52. go one month without fast food
    53. COMPLETED 01/31/06
  53. have at least one personal training session
  54. go jogging 3 times in a week
  55. do at least 50 pushups and 50 crunches 5 days straight
  56. learn to surf
  57. go skydiving
  58. go snowboarding
  59. go to a Laker game
  60. go skiing
  61. go whitewater rafting
  62. visit the new Phi Delt house at FSU
  63. ride my bike on the beach
  64. learn craps
  65. learn to golf
  66. learn Texas Hold 'Em
  67. play racquetball
  68. go horseback riding
  69. play a game of pool
  70. play a game of darts
  71. host a poker game
  72. go rollerblading

    73. random

  73. learn to cook 5 new dishes
  74. go to a movie by myself
  75. write my grandmother a real letter
  76. contact a friend from high school
  77. contact a friend from college
  78. pay back my parents for Japan
  79. attend Mass
  80. get involved in a charity
  81. learn a specialty drink
  82. rent a limo
  83. smoke a cigar
  84. have a glass of scotch
  85. make a new financial investment
  86. buy a new car
  87. buy a new mattress & box spring
  88. buy a digital SLR camera
  89. paint/landscape the Beer Garden
  90. get rid of all the clothes I haven't worn in 2 years
    91. COMPLETED 01/17/06
  91. make and wear my own Halloween costume
  92. go karaoke
  93. take piano lessons
  94. buy an X-Box
  95. throw an 80's party
  96. buy a new jacket
  97. BBQ at Griffith Park
  98. watch the sunset somewhere along PCH
  99. take a spontaneous road trip
  100. go back to the Indy 500
  101. attend an away FSU football game somewhere new

* Items on this list can change at any given moment. So what? It's my list.

Make your own.